Food Sobriety

I am sick of having tits.



Today I read a blog post, and it has changed me.   The post, if you haven't read it, details the writer's struggles with fitness and body image.   I'm not going to lie, it struck a chord with me, it was almost as if I wrote it because it is exactly the same way I feel about my body and health.   It's time for me to make a drastic change to my life, and for a month as of today, I am abstaining from any alcohol, takeaway, dessert, any of that shit which poisons my body.

This may not seem like a big sacrifice, but trust me, if you know me personally, you know how bad I can get with eating the unhealthiest foods around.   This is a big step for me, and I give anyone permission to take an alcoholic drink or a takeaway from me if you see it in my hand, genuinely take it.

Time to start get my body's act together and start feeling healthy again.

Porn Addiction

Today I'm writing about something all of you can relate to, you perverts.

Let me hit you guys up with some statistics.

• As of 2013, we have about 7.125 billion people living on this planet
• There are over 3 billion people around the world who are connected to the internet, roughly 40%
• Approximately 50% of those people use the internet at least once a day, so 20% of the world's population goes online daily, using the stats provided, that means there are roughly 1.425 billion people online every day
• NOW, time for the good stuff, 1 in 5, (ONE IN FIVE!?!?) searches on google are for porn
• So, if we assume that no one watches porn more than once a day... We can state that porn is searched/viewed 285 MILLION times a day

That's crazy!   Like seriously, what the hell!?   How addicted to porn can this planet be?   Let's get real, everyone who is reading this blog has seen it, don't lie to yourselves.   The Hub, you know the one I'm on about, received 5800 page views A SECOND, nice work guys.

Now, from my POV, it's pretty obvious that porn is the most addictive thing on the planet, but is it as bad as smoking, drinking, or drug addiction?   To tell you the truth, I don't really care, I tried to look it up online but I got... distracted.

How I Almost Dated A Pornstar

Andy Warhol coined the phrase '15 minutes of fame'.   He said: "In the future, everyone will be famous for 15 minutes."   Wait, what?!   Just 15 minutes?   Are you kidding me?   Obviously he's not being literal, he means a short amount of time.   Now, I don't know about anyone reading this, but I would love fame, maybe that's just my attention seeking personality.   I've had 15 minutes of fame, well, a day really, and it was amazing.   I know you don't really care, but this is my blog, so I'll tell you anyway.

Sometime in March last year, I thought it would be pretty funny to ask a pornstar to prom with me, and she replied with a yes, on condition that I get 5,000 retweets.   To cut a long story short, The Lad Bible, one of the biggest websites amongst British teenagers, boasting over a million followers, picked up on my story and wrote an article, asking their followers for help.   I got 6,000 retweets in an hour, the next thing I know, an independent company contacts me on Twitter, giving me 2 front row tickets for Drake in exchange for a small amount of promotion.   On top of this, iRadio, and Irish radio station, ask me for an interview, which was an amazing experience.   Everything was set up, I was going to prom with a pornstar.

This dream was cut short by my school, obviously, but what can you do?

For me, this was one of the best days of my life, hands down.   It's something that's never going to happen again and is something I'll remember forever.   If that is even a fraction of what real fame is, then I want more than my 15 minutes.